Recognition

Is wanting recognition for the work or task you do.. bad? Recently I’ve been sort of mentoring a younger guy at work, teaching him a bunch about linux server administration etc. and helping him out. He had to do a server upgrade to resolve an issue with an applications dependency not being updated on the OS the server was on, so I walked him through that, showed him the steps etc. even gave him a test server to practice on for when he did it. Part of the server he was updating had an application on it that another staff memember looked after. Now today that other staff member got recognised for doing great by the younger staff member because he did his job and tested the application after the server upgrade.

I’m feeling a little bitter about this because in my eyes I did so much more, taught and helepd him a lot more. But I don’t get a mention or anything.. Now this is just the latest example, but there’s been more and more stuff like this piling on in my life, both through work and personal, where it just seems like nobody notices or pays attention to anything I do, but when someone else does something similar or sometimes even when someone else does less they get heaped with praise and respect. It just feels unfair.

I guess there’s probably a large part of ego involved here, but is it that really that wrong? Who doesn’t want to be told they’re doing a good job, or thanked for helping out? It makes me feel like why am I even bothering, you know? Nobody is going to care if I do well - either they just expect it or they just don’t notice. But if I don’t do it, then I’ll get in trouble, or be labelled as a nuisance or something.

I’m just so sick and tired of being ‘invisible’ in the world. If I keep being treated as invisible maybe I’ll start acting invisible, see what I can get away with.